post-downton abbey depression edition

Previouslies: Nucky killed another person, making him now officially 3/4 of a gangster (almost there, Nuck!); there was a huge shoot-out and a bunch of characters died!; Charlie Cox was almost naked!; Margaret educated us on the history of pads!; we learned not to make fun of anyone Al Capone knows because he’ll totally smash your face into a bar!; Gyp Rosetti continues to be a spicy meatball; AR continues to be the Sass Queen of New York. IDK it was a really good episode just watch it what do you want from me.

Boardwalk Empire, 3x05 “You’d Be Surprised” (wri. Diane Frolov & Andrew Schneider, dir. Tim Van Patten)

• wow, gyp, good to see you too
• “when did you become a quaker?”
• arnold is so bitchy
• “new jersey, a state i have little interest in, or affection for”  NEW JERSEY
• little known fact: arnold rothstein actually created the “i <3 ny” t-shirt
• oh man i am loving tim van patten’s direction in this episode
• i want an audio clip of michael shannon’s creepy laugh on a loop
• PROFESSOR MUTTONCHOPS RETURNS
• man, what little girl hasn’t harbored romantic notions of one day growing up to run a whorehouse? i mean, we’ve all been there, gillian
• “come, discuss your vagina!” 
• i’ll be there.
• aw, look at our little copywriter
• margaret schroeder = 1920s peggy olson
• let’s get liberated!!!
• kittens, maybe
• KITTENS
• MAYBE
• margaret grabbing owen’s arm like woah
• andrew w. mellon
• THAT’LL DO, PIG
• THAT’LL DO
• stephenrooteatinganorange.tumblr.com/tagged/forever
• oh, eddie cantor
• how are nelson’s wives always so adorable and he’s just like grouchie mcfrankenstein all the time
• “is everything not hunkey-dory?”
• dr. mason’s got a cruuuuush
• AND A HOT FIANCE
• ooooooooo drama
• “that was me knocking” EDDIE YOU ARE NOT ON THIS SHOW ENOUGH
• tabor heights, nj is the twin peaks, wa of the east coast: ONE CAFE ONLY. IF YOU WANT TO EAT, YOU HAVE TO DO IT HERE. AND YOU HAVE TO GET COFFEE. OTHERWISE, YOU WILL BE KILLED BY DEMONS(???) AND/OR A GROWN MAN NAMED GYP.
• l’chaim!
• more jew jokes, plz
• “hey, you forgot your vodka” is a sentence no one will ever say to me
• OH
• SHIT
• YOU
• GUYS
• omg @ margaret giving billie a flyer
• giiiiirl
• that scene was like, perfect comedy writing, wow. PUTTIN’ ON A CLINIC, YO
• chalky’s coat!!!!!
• lol @ this scene. look at all this 21st c. rewrite revenge on cantor for blackface awkward
• chalky & dunn’s reactions are too perf
• i find pleasure in your performance, stephen root
• emotional blackmail!
• “honey, i don’t want you to watch me kill this man whose legs you’re holding because you’re a delicate, precious creature” / “oh my god baby i just love you so much”
• wait. so gillian actually has no idea jimmy’s dead???
• um, obviously we need to get gillian’s whores to margaret’s class. two birds, one stone! the ziegfield vagina monologues of 1922.
• “i must dispose of a body.”
• woah, dang
• that was bugsy, right? 
• welcome to the show, kid.
• also: PENIS ALERT
• rather a nice one, too. two for you, bobby cannavale. you go, bobby cannavale.
• this show really loves to kill kids wearing knitted sweaters, though. that’s like three in two weeks.
• wow, no, but really. congratulations on your penis.
• lol almost forgot about lucy
• whew, i was really worried we’d go the entire show without someone verbalizing the episode’s title but THANK GOD crisis averted
• Diane Frolov & Andrew Schneider are Sopranos vets, so I hope they write more for BE cuz dis episode was gooood